Privacy Policy / プライバシーポリシー
（＋ Bonus Treat）

​ It is hard for me to choose its title..   So, would you pick up whichever you like?

​​​

​

Dirty Dancing

Back to the Future

An Unexpected Journey

Avengers

 Crazy Train

Music & Lyrics

Lost in Translation

​

I must have resonated with an archetype of 'Antman' unconsciously, but it was not in a Matrix Energetics' way..
I was a goofy.  I was squeezed and fell into the quantum hole..   It was very dangerous and I was almost vanished. 
​
I lost many things but I must take back my son's respect!  My Matrix Energetics used to be cool but I lost credibility.. 
I used to be a happy person!  I was so good at living up parties in everywhere!   Why do I have to get disillusion?   This is ridiculous!  Where's my anthem?​

♪All right, yeah.   I got something to say.  

　Yeah, it's better to burn out.  Yeah, than fade away!  
　All right!  Gonna start a fire!
 
​​
" That was COOL!  I have to let people know about it! "

I was so excited after my first seminar of Matrix Energetics.  My eyes must have been sparkling! 
It was just like I had just finished watching the movie, 'Back To The Future' when I was 15 years old.​  
​
Ms. Melissa Joy called me to the stage during the seminar, which was held in Japan, in 2012.
I fell backward even before she tried to do the two-point..  
I had no idea what I was doing. It was kind of embarrassing because I felt like I could stand up easily. I looked for someone to help me to leave there.. 
Then, suddenly my body started moving. I rolled right to left. I stood up, then my arms drew circles. I tried to stop my arms, then my legs moved.  My brain could not follow it!  
It seemed too much for some people.  They looked sour or rolled their eyes. 
It was my version of Marty McFly's Johnny B. Goode experience, because my heart said exactly the same thing,

' I guess you guys aren't ready for that yet..   but your kids are gonna love it!' 
​​

Since then, my body always moved on its own during the seminar.  I did not want to bother other people much. 
I always tried to tighten my body hard, but it always got difficult to stop moving sooner or later.  I wondered why but I danced or strangely moved.  I could not help doing it.  Also, sometimes something HUGE pumped up my chest.  That was just   S O O O O   B - I - I - I - G !!  I felt like my body was too small to hold it! 
​
One time, my index finger started pointing at the ceiling during the seminar.
Ms. Joy told us that she was seeing a huge spaceship above.  I think that she just described or interpreted the consciousness in there.  Most attendees were healers in my country, that was why that image showed up, I guess. Some of the stuffs which were noticed during the seminar by teachers were not mine, like 'Atlantis' stuff, enlightening, awakening, or something.
My inside was always saying,  "dropping-down' is enough for me!" 
My index finger seemed to begin tracking something all over the hall..  I had no idea what my body was doing as usual, however the feeling was  SOOO  GOOOOD !  I never told this to anyone but I was imagining like I was Jon Bon Jovi on the stage in a stadium! 
 

It was difficult for a person like me to be understood by healers, of course. 
If Ed and Justin had already released ' I don't care ', maybe I could be still playful and I could back out of being dragged into other people's 'spiritual dramas'..  However, they kept talking about them to me.. 
Many things happened.  I was finally broken.  

My act got so strange in 2016.  Terrible illusions started attacking me.  I lost about 6kg within one month.
I was blamed by so many existence.  They tried to push me to commit suicide three times but also something was trying to help me inside of me.  
That was the exaggerated version of my experience around Matrix Energetics..  What happened in my head was all based on what I experienced at the seminars, through the internet, and by some healers. The teachers and the field tried to help me to expand but many people did not allow me to do.  I had been conflicted between them from the beginning.  Some healers had power around Matrix Energetics in my country.   They defined what is Matrix Energetics, they told people what is right or not, and they labeled me as a bad example.   I thought that they did not understand Matrix Energetics at all but I was just a housewife to them.   Also, some healers utilized Matrix Energetics to become famous or to make more money.  I was so mad at them but I was no one.  I had been struggling between my true feelings and so-called forgiveness (or generosity, or unconditional love).   However, they were professional healers or certified Matrix Energetics practitioners..  I was not.  I had crushed by my fear, anger, stress, disappointment, and sadness.  Maybe, I felt like I was betrayed by Matrix Energetics finally, without realizing.  Other Japanese were certified  with 60 hours practice but I did 120 hours.  They were introduced properly on the net but I was not.  I did not receive even my certificate.  Whenever I sent them an e-mail, they ignored and I always tried it again.  I was so tired.   I did not want to but I doubted that American ME practitioners or staffs looked down on me like those successful Japanese healers. 
I was just a housewife and I was not rich like them.  I did not have a car.  I lived in a small apartment.   On the other hand, those Japanese healers were earning a lot of money.  Their sessions or seminars were more expensive than Ms. Joy and Dr. Bartlett.  They practiced Matrix Energetics by receiving 50 dollars.  Their spiritual sessions cost 500 dollars.  One of the ex-ME practitioner's seminar cost 1700 dollars for just one day!   I received some of those seminars and sessions because I wanted to know the reason why they did have so much confidence of themselves or their work.  However, I could not understand them..   I was confused.  If Matrix Energetics created them, I had to leave.   I did not want to become like them.  They were talking about something weird sometimes.. My head became busier and busier like, "Was Matrix Energetics created by some alien's help? Then, I did not want to get involved..  Should I become a light body?  Do I have to ascend?  That means I have to leave the earth?  Do I have to say goodbye to my cute son?  NOOOOO!  Ordinary people sometimes tell me that I am kind but healers consider me that I have karma..  What it that?  Am I guilty?  Did I anything wrong during my past-life?  Do I have any past-life?  I don't remember anything..  Do I have to integrate my femininity and my masculinity?  A part of me is a man?  What?!  Can I be satisfied with myself by doing it?  So.. women don't need men..  but I still want to enjoy watching romantic movies!  I should not try to be a healer!  Is UFO coming to save the earth soon?   That's so scary!  I was laughing watching Simon Pegg's movies.. but many healers really mean that?  They are adults, right?  What is going on??  Why are they famous than me?  That's insane!  Did Matrix Energetics change its direction?  I thought that it was simple and easy.. but actually it became very complicated.   I wanted to introduce Matrix Energetics to ordinary people but maybe I misunderstood the field.."
I spent all of my matured endowment for studying spiritual healings and Matrix Energetics but I lost my way.  I had nightmare every night.  I was attacked by UFOs in my dreams..

I sent many senseless e-mails to the office of Matrix Energetics and M-Joy. I appeared strangely at their seminars in Italy and in Seattle.   I scared the teachers and the staffs but my brain was invaded by those crazy information.  
I was usually very rational but everything became just so wrong.  What I was experiencing was too big, too weird, and too much.  What I needed was to leave those healers and the classical Japanese way of thinking COMPLETELY.   I needed to be alone.  I had been trying to leave Matrix Energetics so hard for a long time, but something never let me.  
I felt that something or someone was trying to help me.  It never abandoned me.   ​
 

Dropping down is easy.  It must be designed that everybody can do it.  However, I think the attitude is important.  Some healers consider that they are superior to ordinary people.  They sounded so stupid! 
We don't know much.  How can we know everything about strangers?   I believe that MODESTY is the key for Matrix Energetics. That is why the field of Matrix Energetics is so great.  
I must clear my honor for my family.  I really hurt them.  And, I must stand up because now I heard that another rumor was spread.  According to someone famous in my country, the field of Matrix Energetics is now dirty by people's greed.  It is sad but the reputation around Matrix Energetics has not been so good in my country. 
I have a responsibility to people who cooperated with my practice.  I do not want to scare them.  Someone has to show what the field really is.  The field has always helped me.  The field is innocent and pure like a baby.  The field is generous like a father.  The field is kind like a mother.  That is our job to open its door for infinite possibilities!   I am not so splendid as Dr. Bartlett and Ms. Joy maybe, but there is a bond between the field and me.  It is about consideration to others.  It is about creating a better world!  To achieve it, we should follow something inside of each of us.  
​
I met siblings who were survivors of the atomic bomb in Nagasaki.   They were over 80 years old but they had just started studying English when I met them.  They were willing to communicate with young American people. 
I met an old lady who experienced the Japanese Internment in Canada.  She was 90 years old. She spent her life in that country.  She was very charming and she seemed to have many good friends in there.  She just told me her story.  She never got emotional. 
One of my English teachers introduced herself that she was a German-American.  We became friends and she took me a horseback riding one day.  On our way home, she confided me that her father was escaped from Auschwitz.  I did not know it at all and I was surprised.  She also just told me the story of her family.  I cried a little but she did not cry.  
My swimming teacher let me know about his experience during the war time.  He was about to ride on a boat to Philippine but the war was over.  It was about 250km but he had to walk back to his home on foot.  He told me that it took over a month and he did not remember how he did that at all.  Too much shock vanished its memory, I guess. He was 90 years old and but very energetic when I met him. He was an offspring of Samurai and I learned the traditional samurai swimming by him in just one summer.  It was very interesting because his words were kind of related to Matrix Energetics.  It was exactly about  'flowing like water'!)  His character was straight, clear, and honest.  He expressed his feeling directly with nothing behind.  I like those kind of people.  He used to be a school teacher and I could feel his compassion to his students even when he scolded someone.  Maybe was I the only one who was scolded? (I was already a mom, though.)  I could not stop giggling when he lectured me. 
He reminded me of my grandfather. I always drove him back to the train station after the class.  He told me his stories in the car.  He traveled to visit art museums by airplane only by himself. He was so shocked when he lost his wife.  He found something in the Bible.  He made some friends in overseas through arts. ​

They were all sweet people and they were all curious about different cultures.  They all did not blame anyone.  It must have been so hard for them to be positive, I imagine.  They were living their lives.  They were being themselves.  They were individuals.  They chose to find their peace.  ​


My experience around Matrix Energetics was a disaster but I always thanked for the field.
The first seminar of Matrix Energetics was held in Japan in 2012. We had that huge earthquake on March, 2011.  Everybody worried our future.  We needed hope.  I think that it must have been not so easy for Dr. Bartlett and Ms. Joy to decide to come to my country.  People were afraid of the radioactive pollution.   I had been studying some healing methods and spiritual teachings but I began to doubt them.  I was so scared.  
Dr. Bartlett and Ms. Joy did not have any friends or students in Japan yet.  They did not owe us anything.  However, they bravely visited our country, made us laugh, encouraged us, showed us a new perspective, and gave us hope.  They proved us the power of love in many ways.
They proved me the true spirituality did exist.  I wanted to be stronger and more compassionate like them. 
They were real.

​I presume that love and gratitude can create something big or something great or something beautiful. 
The feedback system does exist, maybe.  As it grows bigger, it may be able to reach to more people who need help.  This is just my hypothesis.  If that is true, each of us can do something for others!  We can make it bigger and more powerful together! 
I think that Matrix Energetics is working by that system because it appeared to help me as soon as I asked for a help!  Therefore, I have always been thanking for all the people who love the field.  Without their love, gratitude, sharing, challenging, and spirit of service, I could not be free, I could not be healthier, and I could not live my life.  I hope my love and gratitude have also worked for making the field more energetic and more powerful!
​​
Do you know Dr. Bartlett is playing music at Patreon?  One of his tune which was ' Purple Rein Master ' blew up my stomachache one day!  It appeared from somewhere and healed it at an instant!  You should try to listen to it!  It may work for something for you, too.  THAT TUNE DOES EXPRESS THE FIELD OF MATRIX ENERGETICS!  It's fun and dynamic!  You may feel dolphin energy.  I felt grace when I first listened to it.  Tears rolled down on my cheeks.
I was trying not to show up much but my heart could not shup up for his music.  I commented like 'Sexy!' for ' Twirling ' and 'COOL!' for 'EMOTING '.  His music worked to take back myself and my Matrix Energetics!  

(I want to recommend his music to movie fans or music fans.   In Japanese, music calls 'on-gaku'.  'On' means 'sounds', and 'gaku' means 'enjoy' or 'easy'.)  
 

I took a shower of rock music everyday while I was young. 
My anger or frustration were so easily sublimated to nicer energies like power and passion! 
My favorite big brothers were singing about freedom, peace, friendship, justice, love, and human's pain. 
They encouraged me, inspired me, and healed me.  And, they still do.  
​
I look usually easy-going, but music sometimes stimulates me. 
One time, I was so resonated with Axl Rose during their concert.  I was so surprised that I saw a security guard rushing to me.  I did not realize that I was standing on the top of my seat..  I did only recognize music at that time.  Every other things were gone.  I loved their passionate energy.  They were real.  
I was not interested in something spiritual when I was young but I remembered that I had a clairvoyant experience once.  I was surprised to see three different musical notes flowing through in front of me at the Blue Note.  It was happened at a concert of a jazz trio.  That was magical!
 
I seemed to resonate with some morphic fields of entertainment during the seminars of Matrix Energetics.  I stepped sideways like Steven Taylor, danced like Uma Thurman in 'Pulp Fiction', and posed like John Travolta in 'Saturday Night Fever'.  I had not even watched those movies but ,you know, the both of dancing scenes were very famous.  I am sure many people have tried, so the morphic fields exist?   I could dance Pharrell Williams's 'Happy' one day.  It was my first time to listen to it, though.  I did not know that people were dancing it all over the world. (I am not so a good dancer.  It is enough for me to have just a little fun.) 
I just played with anything in the field.  I had never imagined that I would do some Michael Jackson! I could not do moonwalk but my dancing was not so bad as just an aunty. 
I naturally moved or danced whenever Ms. Jonsson called me to the stage during the seminars.  I loved dancing but it was kind of a secret.  I was never going to do that in front of many serious healers..  



My last comment, before I became crazy, was for a picture of Dr. Bartlett on his Patreon page.  
It reminded me of a workshop of Tony Stark  in the movie, Ironman 2. 
My both hands naturally created a circle, a triangle, a triangular prism, and a sphere while I was listening to his tune that day..  I was not interested in geometry stuff at all but those shapes were been using for making a new Arc Reactor in that movie!  Wow!  I got so excited and wrote like,    

" ' THE  KEY  TO  THE  FUTURE  IS  HERE '  thing  to  me ! "   (' Can you dig it? ')
​
I was so happy,..  but gradually my fear overwhelmed me..
Some people 'around' Matrix Energetics had been talking behind my back.  Some healers were always checking my acts.  A certain ME practitioner blamed me that I was just fooling around.  They did not like me to dance, enjoy, or laugh in the field.  I was afraid like, 'Other people may consider me as a crazy person and they may talk something on the internet again..'   I could not endure that anymore.  Too much stress and fear literally took me to the  ' highway to hell '!
Since that night, Dr. Bartlett and Ms. Joy starting blaming me in my head. 
They changed to strict and mean teachers and they tried to catch and punish me.  
The real Dr. Bartlett was fun and Ms. Joy was friendly but they were mixed up with some other healers in my head.
​
It went to the ME Seminar in Italy in 2016. 
Things were so strange.  It was like the splendid consciousness technology was crushed in me..  
I must have looked a little weird.  My hair was terrible and I had bags under my eyes.  It was very noisy in my head even though I was smiling. It was like I insisted to be trained to become BOND!  It was torture.  Really.  I was not allowed to sleep..  At the third day of the seminar, Dr. Bartlett and Ms. Joy were blaming at me in front of all the people 'in my head'..  It was very strange how that kind of thing was possible..  I wished I could talk, eat, and make friends with other attendees.  I met many friendly and warm people.  They healed me.  It was the best seminar of Matrix Energetics to me even though I was in such a severe situation.

I am still feeling very sorry for people who attended the seminar in Seattle in 2016.  I did not want to sneak in.  That was not my will. The voices of my head pushed me into the seminar room..  It was like they were pushing me to be exiled from Matrix Energetics forever.  It was very sad what happened.   
I wanted to try to explain before the seminar to the teachers but the staff told me that they did would never see me. 
However, now I want to say something to their staffs.  They did not give my certificate when I became a practitioner.  I asked it but they ignored me.  Also, they left my introduction page stupidly like '??????????????????????'   They never gave me a code to enter the HP of Matrix Energetics.  They never said 'Sorry', EVER.   I was never treated properly by them.  I gave up and I left without complaining.   Maybe, that was also the reason why this was happened.  I am not allowed to show up in front of teachers, so I must explain everything in here.   
I hate to do this, though.  It sounds like I am a small person!   I left their HP before my renewal.  They asked me why but it was too late.  I have had enough!  However, I pretended to be OK and I told them, ' Well, I might go back again someday..'   
Well, now it sounds scary..   Do not see me as an Avenger.  I am a simple person like Captain America! I did not mean that.   I was tired of everything and I did not want to be watched by other healers..  (By the way, I think that Ms. Joy resembles Captain Marvel.  Supergirl is only popular in the States.  She should resonate with CM when she is out of the States.) 

I must let them know the field of Matrix Energetics is safe.  I just became strange.   Even though I was not OK, I could do Matrix Energetics.  I am sorry for people who played with me in the field of Matrix Energetics together in Italy.  Please do not worry.  I still had been experiencing many miracles during and after the hard time.   My immune system must have gone down and I had many troubles, but they were usually helped without medication.  One time I went to see a doctor because I could not stop coughing.  He seemed to be confused with the number of something. 
I think what I did was to drop down 'with my head'..  It just ruined myself.  I thought too much.
​

That was the most terrible experience but it made me honest like this.  I had to endure everything alone before.  
Maybe, Ms. Joy's work was unfolded?  She called me to the stage and worked for me about my 'female stuff' at the seminar.  I wondered why before, but now I get it. 
I was kind of picked on by some healers.  I became weak since I had become a housewife because I did not earn any money.   I used to talk straightly.  I used to stand up for harassments at offices.  I was pretty strong.  Ms. Joy woke me up.  She tried to help me at the that third seminar again.  I ran up to the stage and requested, " Well.. I am now just a housewife and my world is small.   I want to have a better life. "   
What is going to be?

​
​♪Rock of ages!    Rock of ages!

　　  Still  rollin' !    keep  a-rollin' !

My first move was just caused by the torsion field, I realized.
It is rolling in many ways and it is very powerful and very electric.  
It is about expansion, which means setting me free.  It is about love & peace. .  Matrix Energetics is rock & roll !
OK..   I had no idea what I was doing before but now I can understand.  
I was just shifted from the classical spiritual world to my rock 'n' roll kingdom by the field.  
That was why..   I kept pointing Dr. Bartlett with my index finger at my first seminar.   That was why.. I was fling up my arms..   That was why.. I bounded off my seat as soon as the teachers appeared on the stage in the morning..  Those acts were all what I used to do at the rock concerts!   
Yes, Dr. Bartlett was SO charismatic like a rock star.  Ms. Joy talked like an improviser.  The seminar was more like a rock concert.  It was very exciting!  
My heart was woken up but my head was confused and tried to stop it. 
Then, the struggle showed up in a strange way..   I should be me!

The relationship between ME and me started like the famous phrase, ' Love is like a bomb! '   
It asked me, ' Do you take sugar?  One lump or two? '  (Hey! That is just like about the zero-point field!  One lump of sugar can be powerful enough to boil the whole water in all ocean on earth or something, right?)  
The field ' kicked started my heart ' and it was a real ' live wire '! 
Ms. Joy reminds me of the cool female guitarist Nancy Wilson/HEART!   Dr. Bartlett became my Ritchie Blackmore.  I practiced Matrix Energetics like Bryan Adams in his song ' Summer of '69 ' ! (That's my all-time favorite tune!)
But I was not brave enough to be myself..   My inside was like Ed Sheeran's ' I'm a mess '.  
I needed someone who could understand my feeling..   I listened to Skid Row's ' Monkey Business ',  ' Slave to the grind ', ' The Threat '(That is a cool tune!), and ' Quicksand Jesus '. 
Bryan Adams's ' Here I Am ' was my polar star. 
Though what I was doing was ' All For Love ',  no one understood me.  The field and I sang ' We weren't born to follow ' and 'Because we can', but actually our situation was more like 'Livin' On A Prayer'..   I was desperate and I doubted everything I did and what I learned.  My heart sang ' These Days '.. but my heart was resonated with the tune ' This House Is Not For Sale '!   Maybe, I will sing ' God Bless This Mess ' when I will be 60 or 70.
I found that Ed Sheeran's ' What do I know? ' exactly expressed my feeling, my attitude, and my world with my ME.  
Have you ever seen his performance at his concert?  He can create the all the sounds at the same time by the pedal loop. 
That is exactly what we do in the field!  Matrix Energetics is a multi-processor. 　
 

Matrix Energetics is just for people who are kind, compassionate, playful, sincere, and down-to-earth.  I know that because, according to my research, people who were greedy, mean, or rude could not connect with the field.  They were lecturing totally different at the seminars or on the net.  I found out that they had never felt grace. 
'Resonance' comes first.  We cannot connect with the field of Matrix Energetics without it.  So, the field can never get dirty.  

I feel good to be honest now.  I used to be so scared to be known my preference when I was a certified  Matrix Energetics practitioner.   Now I have no responsibility because I am an EX.  It is OK to love beer.   I am dreaming to have a huge steak in New York someday.   I want to sip some wine in Provence or Tuscany.  I am bad in the spiritual realm but I am not so bad in the ordinary world.   I love freedom!  However, it is just the matter of my country.   'Spiritual' means sometimes religion in my country.  They are totally opposite, though. 
Matrix Energetics should be safe.  Matrix Energetics should be simple.
I believe that Matrix Energetics is for ordinary people.  I THINK THAT IT SHOULD BE A WORKING CLASS HERO!
I am just a Hobbit-ish small Japanese woman but I will scream now!

​

" GREEDY   PEOPLE  SHALL   NOT   PASS! " 
 

Those healers treated me like a lazy and crazy grasshopper, but I was actually a worker ant.   I should not have traveled in a fake quantum world where fake healers or fake spiritual teachers were talking about.  They made me smaller and smaller like 'Antman' and my voice did not reach to anyone.   I was back to be an  'Aunt Woman'!  This is my life-size and  I am satisfied with it.  Can everybody hear me?  I was vanishing like Marty McFly in the world..  but   '  Here   I   Am  '  !   
I wanted to be strong.  I needed to be stronger.   

They could take away my house, all my tricks and toys.  One thing they couldn't take away..   

I Am Ironwoman!

What's wrong with being a housewife?   Do they still consider that they know better than me?   
Did someone teach them that they became smarter than their moms by learning spiritual stuff?
Ha!   To this mom, they were like willful children.  They should grow up! 

Do you know the tale of 'The Ants and The Grasshopper'? 

Many Japanese healers considered and treated me like the grasshopper in that story because I was a housewife.  They were living in fancy places wearing expensive clothes but I think that many of them were secretly working and they did not pay taxes.  So, maybe they could not receive the temporary welfare payment for covid-19.  Do they still say like, ' Look!  I am loved by the universe!" ?  Actually, those racists were the lazy grass hoppers and I was an worker ant!  I think that I have the right to hit those healers' heads asking, " Hey, hey, anybody home? "

I had to do this otherwise I was vanishing like Marty Mcfly in the world.

​

My Delorean (Matrix Energetics) was fixed by Dr. Bartlett's music.  He is my Doc.  I can face up by Ms. Jonsson's work.  I think that I can quit ANT WOMAN.   I will be just a 'AUNT' WOMAN.   This is my life size but my heart is VERY BIG!   I have not told what I expericenced to anyone completely..  I really wish my son would be proud of his mom someday..   

No, more than that, I want my son to understand that his mother always cherished him above all else some day.  I'm just like Tony Stark's dad!

​​

​

​

After finishing this, I realized...

Could it be that I received the blessings of the frequencies of the Cosmic Father and Cosmic Mother from Matrix Energetics, and the work of the sacred masculine and feminine within the M-Joy Field?!   If that's the case, does that mean I was able to prove to everyone that Matrix Energetics and M-Joy field really work? 　Wow,... Wooow! WOOOOOOOOOW!  That's awesome!

​

​

​